iowa hearts civil liberties

iowa went where no man, woman, or child ever thought a middle-america state would go. yesterday, its supreme court unanimously overturned the state's ban on same-sex marriage. in the words of justice mark s. cady, "we are firmly convinced the exclusion of gay and lesbian people from the institution of marriage does not substantially further any important government objective... we have a constitutional duty to ensure equal protection of the law". yeah...

the more shocking news is that many iowans are outraged at this abomination. according to the ny times, one woman even exclaimed 'angrily' that she's "almost ready to up and leave iowa and move back to minnesota". whyzat, exactly? is minnesota more sympathetic to bigotry? i realize i'm a left-coast-big-city-latte-drinking (though i prefer a grande iced coffee in a venti cup with about a quarter cup of half and half)-liberal, and i can't really speak on behalf of iowans, but lady, i bet iowa won't miss you if you pack your intolerance and move up and over a state or two.

iowa chose yesterday against amending its constitution to discriminate against a group of its citizens. i hope my own state's supreme court thinks long and hard about following iowa's lead (as well as those of connecticut and massachusetts), because as hopeful as i am that it would only be a temporary set back for those of us fighting for equal rights for all californians, it would be a slap in the face from a state i know and love for its progressive march in the direction of better.

~k

at sea in search of whales

i took this picture, about five and a half minutes after i picked my jaw up off the deck of the boat...

when a friend plans a "whale watching" outing, it sounds really cool. (i mean, there's a comment box below. go ahead and try to name a cooler outing). and when you get on the boat, you don't know if you'll see a whale or a dolphin or really anything. but you go anyway. you go because the chance of seeing a whale in the wild, on its turf and its terms, is more than worth an equal chance no whale comes alone (and they sell booze on board which would more than make up for spending three to four fruitless hours rocking away at sea). i mean, if it wasn't, i'd just jump on the freeway, head on down to sea world, and look shamu right in the eye. but it's not so much the whale as the whale in its home.

and lemme just tell you how much it took the wind out of my lungs the first time i saw the above humpback arch its back high, dive below the surface, and flip up its tail. i never even reached for the camera, nary a thought to capturing the sight of it on film, because it didn't matter. seeing that whale out in the middle of the ocean was nothing short of extraordinary. it was only then i discovered that whales are a bit on the showy side (i mean, how could they not be? this is southern california, after all), and they return to the surface to take a breath and satisfy their curiosity of us, in intervals that run anywhere from five to 20 minutes, and i'd get another shot at that perfect shot.

the best part is that i've been high on nature all week, and i don't even like nature. i mean, i love nature in theory, i love preserving nature and sharing the world with nature, and i really love seeing animals in their natural habitat (except for bugs, snakes, and any creepy hairy thing that might have rabies), but i don't like being dirty, or sleeping on the ground, or being cold, or eating from a dirty pan over an open fire, or spending the night with only a thin layer of nylon separating me from lions and tigers and bears.

so i guess what i'm trying to say is that while it'll likely be snowing in hades before you'd find me camping or recommending any such excursions in nature (unless we're talking about a cabin with hot water and appropriate amenities), i'm pretty sure there isn't a soul on earth who shouldn't spend an afternoon at sea in search of whales.

~k

being a sponge

i'm absorbing information. and i'm thinking (some of you have asked why i'm writing about panty lines instead of politics. it's because i can't not write (and it would seem i can't not write to an audience (all 15 of you, bless you!)), and right now, i can't really write about politics). because i don't know that i've made up my mind about things. i mean, totally uncharted waters for me, politically. i'm trying to understand before speaking (much, anyway).

lotsa scary stuff happening out there, lotsa scary people with scary weapons, economies plunging, tensions rising. and we're out of the business of telling the rest of the world how to live, because we're too busy fighting over spending with the guys who bankrupted us. it's kind of a lot to get my arms around. but i'm working on it. i hope you'll stick through the panty line and itinerary diaries (probably one about whales to follow) till i can get back to my political ranting.

i'm sure it will be any day now ;)

~k

decry the line

the panty line, that is.

for the sake of full disclosure, i should probably admit to being that skinny bitch who complains when my size 0 pants feel too snug. but this skinny bitch checks her ass every morning, in the full-length runway mirror, before leaving the house advertising that i'm too fat for my panties.

seriously, if your panties squeeze your ass so tightly that a line digs in, and creates the perception that you have four ass cheeks instead of two, i see that you have three options: (1) get over the fact that you no longer fit into those mediums, and buy bigger underwear and bigger pants to fit over your bigger ass and bigger panties, (2) switch to a thong (they really aren't _that_ bad), or (3) stop wearing underwear altogether.

those really are your only options. i'm sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but you look like you don't have a mirror or a clue when you walk around in public sporting four ass cheeks.

~k

47 martinis in northern california

i've thought long and hard about how best to wrap up this past weekend, this past weekend of random awesomeness which could likely be summarized in a few chosen words, something like 'drunken escapades and age denial' but i fear that a somewhat negative connotation might lead you to believe that it wasn't the BEST WEEKEND EVER!

so, i'm thinking a monday-morning quarterbacking itinerary might be the right approach...

friday, march 20
8 pm - depart los angeles in a prius packed with three women and the kitchen sink, sing alanis morissette at top of lungs for six straight hours.

saturday, march 21
2 am - arrive oakland, move in, catch up, wind down, go to sleep in a living room converted into a camp site

8:30 am - breakfast with law school friends

10:30 am - send texts to sleeping compadres to get their asses up for an adventure across the bay

11:30 am - board BART, destination powell

12 noon - ascend stairs into san francisco, just in time for anti-war protest/rally

12:12 pm - bored with protest, find bar. consume martini's 1-10.

2 pm - halfway to trashed, all board cable car, destination fisherman's wharf. act like drunk monkeys, hang off said cable car, wave at passerby's, take lotsa pictures, try to avoid raindrops, laugh a lot (pee a little in pants from said laughing).

3 pm - low visibility of golden gate bridge and alcatraz. resume drinking. consume martini's 11-25.

4:20 pm - stumble onto dock, in search of facebook photo op (e.g. golden gate bridge hiding behind foggyness). play with nets, climb up and down ladders, dance around, embrace being wasted, take loads of what will later be known as 'classic vacation photos'.

5 pm - still wasted (one of us more so than the rest), run into perverted statue of small child with orgasmic look on his face while appearing to be, um, bumming another small child bent over a fountain. behave obnioxiously. annoy other tourists. laugh hysterically. pee a little in pants.

5:15 pm - skip the cable car for a taxi to union square, destination H&M. compadres sit in floor while i shop (and for the record, 'twas not my idea to shop (in fact, i do believe that the instigator of the shopping leg of the trip was the most wasted of us who caused others to join her in huddle on floor), i just can't stop myself once put into the situation where racks of clothes beg to be tried on and purchased).

6 pm - all board BART, destination oakland.

6:45 pm - projectile vomiting (not me).

7-9 pm - nap

10:30 pm - delicious dinner, mua in oakland, martinis 26-47 (this might be an exaggeration).

12 midnight - strawberry shortcake

1 am - nighty night

sunday, march 22
10 am - breakfast with hostesses

12 noon - visit golden gate bridge, nearly blow away while trying to pose for that perfect facebook picture, dance around, act foolishly, nearly fall down pathway.

12:30 pm - prius on pch, passengers prepared for a seven-hour drive home. visual orgasms around each bend.

10 pm - arrive silver lake. whoever said san francisco to los angeles on the pacific coast highway is a 7-hour drive is mistaken, unless the road is empty, you have a car that can take 90-degree curves at 90 m.p.h., and you have no interest in stopping along the way for facebook photo ops.

as you can probably gather, this trip revolved around the road, booze, misbehaving, facebook photo ops, and quality time with quality people i am honored to call friends. in a word, fucka-awesome!

till the next one...

~k

a word from team u.s.a. economy

christina romer knocked it out of the park this morning on meet this press. she knew her history, she understood what caused the great depression and was able to articulate (there's that word again. will someone remind me what's it code for?) her knowledge. and she was confident in the administration's plan, and that confidence beamed off the screen, presenting a much sunnier vision of the treasury dept (we all know tim's ain't the personality you want in the media), that once the government gives the economy just the tug it needs, confidence will cautiously but quickly rebound. when david grilled her on the spending the government is proposing in areas where "maybe it would be better to wait", she smiled and said (i'm paraphrasing here), "i'm glad you asked. we have to deal with education, health care, energy, _to_ restore the economy, and it'll be a healthy change for the country." (or in my thoughts, the beginning of a new revolution. not just going green to chase after a buck, but it's because it's the right thing to do. fixing schools and bettering the educations of all so america can be the best and brightest nation on earth. providing health care with an emphasis on prevention (instead of all these goddamn pills doctors push on its patients (except my doctor who never encourges me to take that crap) - pills pushed on doctors by big drug manufacturers run by big greedy assholes (oops, off subject)) and living a healthy life because a healthy america is the most innovative and admired america. and cleaning our rivers, lakes, and air of the toxicity left by our use of fossil fuels, while assisting in the development of an industry (and a whole slew of new jobs) that will eliminate our need for those toxic fossils.)

i thought she did well presenting a good case for the treasury department's handling of the crisis.

p.s. i had an amazing day today.

~k

moved by a daily dish

earlier this week, andrew sullivan wrote one of the most moving posts i've ever read (seriously, if you haven't seen it, you should check it out http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_dish/2009/03/believing-throu.html ), and it's still with me.

it's not just that he's a disappointed conservative, but it's his pained recognition about being repeatedly beaten down by a party he can no longer call his own. his words, the emotion, the personal agony over what has become of his once beloved and ever-defended republican party leap from the page of his blog with such passion, it still weighs heavily at the bottom of my heart. his admission that, "I do not have liberalism's confidence in government activism, I do not share its collectivist instincts, I find its interest groups unappealing. I do not and never will belong," are words of man searching for answers to the question of his own identity. so painful and heartwrenching, so honest and open, so beautiful and authentically human.

'tis my goal as a writer to leave such a lasting impact on my readers...

as for andrew sullivan, i hope he doesn't give up on his party. i mean, i'm a liberal. i believe in government activism, i shares its collective instincts, and i am drawn to its interest groups. part of me revels in seeing the republican party crashing and burning in a tailspin of fire and confusion, and i am angry that they have the nerve to cry fiscal conservativism after spending eight years throwing fuel on the firey shores of lake deficit. but the american part of me appreciates that we have a system of checks and balances, that i can enjoy my moment of liberal leadership directing our country toward a place of better equality and more opportunity, knowing that the conservatives will get their shit together and launch a comeback just in time to keep the country from crossing a line too far left for a safe return to center. and the cycle will repeat itself again so that we will be ready to take back over, just when the right-wing nutbags have brought us once again to the brink of catastrophe.

if andrew sullivan sticks it out, he can be an integral leader in the right's search for its post-dubya identity. and i think he's just the guy for the job. keep on a keepin' on, andrew sullivan, your party needs your sense more now than ever before...

~k