04 January 2011

the end of an era

where do i even begin?

this whole little year end rundown might get a bit boring, so i do apologize, but watching the chips of my life fall into place with such effortlessness and to land so beautifully is a lot to wrap my mind around.

just a coupla years ago, i walked out of a year forcibly leaving all the shit behind. i shed all the ropes and shackles holding me back (being haunted by my failed marriage and fearing at my core that i would always be alone), and went to paris alone to revel in my solitude and celebrate my liberty. it was there i learned that i could love someone again, someone who loved me just as much.

so that when i met him, en route to my new (see temporary) life, i would never doubt that he's the one i'm meant to share my life with. and after an insane roller coaster of a year (getting scarlet, leaving los angeles, zip's wedding, driving across the country with my brother, and starting a new (blech) life and a new job on the other coast), i'm ready to be a grown up and seize the life i really want. and i found the person i want to be a grown up with.

the best part is that he feels the same way. this past sunday, he put his grandmother's engagement ring on my finger at brunch in a rotating restaurant on top of st louis, and asked me to marry him. and even though there was no doubt in his mind that i was going to say yes, he was so nervous he was shaking. that's the love i want. and the love i want to give.

so here's to 2011, the best year of my life.

so far...



  1. why am I sitting at here crying?

    i'm so happy for you!